I Love My Wife!
by Accidentally The Whole Fanfic
Summary: Jack works so hard... he loves his work, and he loves his wife. But maybe he loves the work a little too much.


I Love My Wife!

* * *

Jack Malegra knew farming was going to be hard work the moment he signed up for the Exciting Ranch Plan. He didn't mind - he loved to feel the muscles burn, feel the tendons stretch and ache, feel the sweat drench his body, feel the sun redden the back of his neck beneath the damp locks of brown hair tumbling from beneath his cap.

Till, plant, water, harvest, ship, feed, milk, shear, ride, herd, fish, forage - a melodious chain, motivational lyrics to his mind's ears.

Of course, he made time to socialize - and, in the three years since he'd moved to Flower Bud Village, not only had he formed close bonds with many of the villagers, but he'd also found best friends, owned two houses, and married a gorgeous and spunky woman with the same passion for hard work blazing in her soul.

It was at the end of one crisp September evening that Jack, finishing up with a healthy harvest, checked his watch and almost screamed.

9 o'clock P.M.

It was the evening of his first wedding anniversary, and though he and Gwen had barely seen hide nor hair of each other for the past few weeks due to the intense workload, they'd planned a very special and intimate evening... that was supposed to have taken place hours ago.

"Nooooooo!" Jack groaned, smacking his forehead as he rushed to the home he shared with Gwen, right across from the Blue Sky Ranch... right across from where that freakishly bulky, big-headed, and beady-eyed fuck _Bob_ was always watching Gwen work with a wistful expression on his face.

"Gwen!" Jack panted as he threw open the door to their cozy, humble home, leaning against the doorframe and panting. "...Gwen?"

No response. As he focused his sight on the house, he noticed a nearly-empty bottle of wine nearby, as well as... two plates. A heavy smell of stir fry hung in the air.

Jack hated stir fry. Bob loved stir fry.

Gwen was likely mad...

Gwen wanted comfort and company...

Jack tore from the house blindly, slamming the door hard enough to make the windows rattle. He leapt the Blue Sky Ranch's fence and made a beeline for the tool shed. Such suspicious noises coming from there... laughing... that tinkling laugh! _Gwen!_

Gwen and someone else...

"BOB!" Jack roared as he tore open the door, catching his wife in the act with that filthy...

...

"Jack!" Gwen gasped, covering her chest with one arm and waving a hand at him. "Get out of here!"

Jack did no such thing. He simply stood there, dumbfounded, as he took in the sight before him. Gwen, blonde ponytail disheveled, shirt off, passionately entwined with... with...

"Let him watch, baby," Jamie murmured, nipping at her ear. "Let's show him how a woman needs to be touched."

Jack fell to his knees. "But... Gwen..."

Gwen sighed. "C'mon, Jack, you fell in love with your work instead of me. What was I supposed to do? Jamie here... now _he_ knows how to treat a woman... she?" She looked puzzled, and glanced at Jamie for help.

"Tonight, I'm whatever you want me to be, baby," Jamie purred, licking teasingly up her neck. Gwen giggled.

Jack snapped out of his shock and heartbreak. "But... but..."

"Oh, come off it, Jack," Jamie's voice came from behind him. He whirled around, only to see Jamie standing in front of him, her breasts freed from her colorful poncho.

"Yeah, just give it up already!" Jamie snapped from behind him. Jack whirled around again, shrieked, and stumbled back - Jamie was walking toward him on the ceiling, waggling his penis about.

"What are you scared of, Jack?" Jamie asked from beside him.

"Yeah, Jack, are you okay?" Jamie asked as she rose up from the floor.

"I think Jack needs help!" Jamie chimed in as he burst through the window, screaming, teeth bared.

"Jack..."

* * *

Gwen couldn't stand it. Her husband was wrapped up in a strait jacket, writhing helplessly, screaming at demons only his eyes could take in. There was no clarity in his eyes - he was gone. A broken man.

"I'm sorry," Alex whispered, hugging her. "We did everything we could."

"If he hadn't worked so hard," Gwen sobbed. "Dammit! I kept telling him he had too many fields planted, too many animals to take care of... he never slept..."

"We're here to help you through this," Gina said, squeezing Gwen's hand. "It's not much, but..."

"Thanks," Gwen sniffled, wiping her eyes. "Really. I... I have to go home... maybe I'll go to the Inn tonight or something, I can't deal with this right now..."

The doctor and nurse nodded helplessly, and Gwen ran off into the night, desperate to escape the image of her tortured husband, his screams ringing fresh in her ears no matter how far she ran from them:

"No! No! Get off of her! I love you! Please don't take her! I'm sorry... I'm sorry! I promise I'll pay more attention to you... please! I said I love you! Where are you coming from? Stop it!"

* * *

Geez. I'm such an asshole to the characters sometimes. This started out as an idea for a humor piece. Feel free to leave a review!


End file.
